Osama Versus Obama

TALE OF THE TAPE
OBAMA VS OSAMA

NAME
Barack Obama

HEIGHT/WEIGHT/AGE
6'1 185 pounds 46 years old

REASON FOR FAME
He is uniting this country. Future president of the world.

TOUGHNESS QUOTIENT 1-10

7- He is Black, so that automatically makes him tough. He is half African, so not only can he fight, he can battle.

PRIMARY OFFENSIVE WEAPON
His words. He can motivate and uplift with his mouth piece, but he is also an underrated shit talker.

BIGGEST WEAKNESS
He may not fight dirty in an attempt to maintain a positive image.

HOW TO BEAT HIM
Vote McCain

WHY I HATE HIM
Jealousy, and because Obama girl wants to bang him

WHY I LOVE HIM/HER
He can save our country

X FACTOR
He plays basketball so he has the stamina for a long fight if necessary.


NAME
Osama Bin Laden

HEIGHT/WEIGHT/AGE
6'6 155 pounds 51 years old

REASON FOR FAME
Most evilest person alive

TOUGHNESS QUOTIENT 1-10
0

PRIMARY OFFENSIVE WEAPON
Sneak attack

BIGGEST WEAKNESS
His kidneys, due to his dialysis as well as his weak chin which he hides with that beard.

HOW TO BEAT THEM
Get inside his reach advantage.

WHY I HATE HIM/HER
Because he is the devil

WHY I LOVE HIM/HER
N/AX

FACTOR
His odor. Living in caves and carrying around a dialysis machine cannot be good for the body odor.

What Max Kellerman Says:
Hocus Pocus is Hocus Pocus. Man is Obama good, long, lean, and can take a shot as his campaign definitely exhibits. Obama in an easy victory. Ouch.