The Teletubbies versus The Wiggles















TALE OF THE TAPE
THE TELETUBBIES VS THE WIGGLES


NAME: The Wiggles
HEIGHT/WEIGHT/AGE: Avg Height-5'7 Total Weight-521 pounds
REASON FOR FAME: Are they gay? Are they straight? Are they gay? Are they straight?
TOUGHNESS QUOTIENT 1-10: -2- I give them a 2 because the red shirt guy and the yellow shirt guy were in a punk band in the '80's, for real.
PRIMARY OFFENSIVE WEAPON: The Asian Wiggle.
BIGGEST WEAKNESS: Pedophiles.....Was that joke too dirty? NOHOW TO BEAT HIM/HER: Start a sing along- they can't help themselves but to join in
WHY I HATE HIM/HER: Their outfits cause seizures.WHY I LOVE HIM/HER: Their song- Toot Toot Chugga Chugga Big Red Car- is actually about a drive by
X FACTOR: The Wiggle in the red shirt won a bronze in boxing during the 1992 Summer Olympics.....just kidding, Their X-factor is choreography- they can choreograph a dance and an ass whipping

NAME: The Wiggles
HEIGHT/WEIGHT/AGE: Avg. Height- 6'8 Total Weight- 975 pounds
REASON FOR FAME: They raise your kids for you, and make you insane
TOUGHNESS QUOTIENT 1-10: -1- Look at them
PRIMARY OFFENSIVE WEAPON: Their annoyingly high voices induce vomiting
BIGGEST WEAKNESS: Their fat asses
HOW TO BEAT HIM/HER: Bring Up the Fact that Tinky-Winky is a homosexual
WHY I HATE HIM/HER: The four characters' names are: Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa and Po. Re-read that, fucking nuts
WHY I LOVE HIM/HER: If you are stoned and watch them your mind will collapse onto itself like a black hole
X FACTOR: The sun baby...DA-DA




1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Both parties involved in this fight are called "The Wiggles".