10 Things I Learned From The Convention

• 10- Michelle Obama is a better speaker than I thought.We should have a Hillary and Michelle ticket in 8 years. White and Black equals bitch attack. It would be the most formidable mixed race partnership since Mel Gibson and Danny Glover. With Hilla's pants suit army and Michelle's minolo army boots the Republicans may concede just to avoid the cascade of Ivy League PMS fueled bombardment.
• 9- The 18 millions cracks in the ceiling that Hillary created must have all been made by her face- jeez. High Def TV was not made for the Yale grad.
• 8- The Obama daughters should get their own show on The Disney channel. Miley Cyrus and Raven Symone couldn't hold a candle to the two girls. It's like they were made of pixie sticks they were so sweet. Now onto my honest opinion- don't ever give a child the microphone during a convention- ever- Republican or Democratic.
• 7- Keith Olbermann is passionate. But his passion is slowly starting to smell of vinegar.So maybe tune it down a bit before you become a full blown douche on par with the other media types I, and the American public loathe.
• 6- I am in love with Rachel Maddow.
• 5- Nancy Pelosi is a GILF.
• 4- I still wish that Obama would have chosen Hilla the Hun as his running mate. That woman garnered 18 million votes and she gave a speech worthy of a Clinton. Her speech actually overshadowed Bill's. I am on board with Biden, but Hilla was my choice.
• 3- How the fuck did Gore screw up the 200 election? God damn it!!! That fucker royally screwed the pooch, kitten, and house maid by not being himself and not attaching himself to Bill's teet. Watching Gore loose and relaxed and delivering a nice speech actually angered me. I am mad because instead of a seemingly competent man- Gore- we received an incompetent dolt- Bush.
• 2- Have you ever run into an old girlfriend that you hadn't thought of in a long time, but once her image is re-imprinted upon your retina you recall how much you loved her? That is how I felt when Clinton appeared on stage.
  

O Bill Clinton, Bill Clinton, wherefore art thou Bubba?

Deny thy father and refuse thy name;

Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love

• 1- If Obama is not sworn in as our next president I may have to shoot myself in the kneecap in an attempt to divert the anguish and pain I feel over the loss to the ache in my knee. I am beginning to dry heave just thinking about Johnny Mac taking the oath. I may go out today and buy a Bible, Torah, and Koran and pray to all three for an Obama victory.