I'm Back

I took about a week long hiatus from writing to my eight devotees, but now I am back. If you would like to know what I did during my sabbatical, then I'll tell you.

• I have a job so I had to work like a mofo
• I work with the state Democratic party so I had some work to do with them as well.
• I went to a wedding.
• Speaking of the nuptials. The bride and groom were Hispanic and all the food and drink servers were white. I don't have a joke, I just like seeing white people serve Hispanic people on occasion.
• I watched the season finale of the bachelor.
• I came up with my strategy if I ever get a bank account big enough to appear as "The Bachelor." I would attempt to have sex with as many of the women as possible. At the rose ceremony I would eliminate only those I have fucked, if I don't hit it then they can stay. I'll keep eliminating sexual partners until the end. If I bone every chick, then I pick no one. If there is a woman at the end that I haven't had the joy of copulating with, then she can marry me. The best part about this strategy is that I would make sure the viewers knew about my elimination technique, that way they would actually know who fucked me and who didn't. This will raise rating through the roof.
• I saw this homeless woman the other day that with a few minor make over techniques might be kind of cute. Plus if I took her out on a date I could drop her off any where I wanted when the date ended.
• I am learning to speak Italian right now. I just thought I'd tell y'all, so when I get sexy enough to speak Italian you will be ready.