Drive by Relationship

Fun Game Alert- Drive on the expressway with your knees while rolling a joint on the back of you blackberry; and try not to die, cause that's what I can do. Bitches

Alright, peep this. I was wooed, dated, and then dumped during that same ride home. As I completed rolling that joint I laid it in the passenger seat and buckled it in until I could find my lighter; safety first. I pulled off of the expressway and DA-DA, I saw her. She was a brunette with blue eyes that caused a deep languor to set into my knees. But what the fuck was I to do, I was driving and as a driver I had to remain as laconic as possible, so I continued looking for my lighter and drove.

We hit the same light. I looked to my right and she smiled and waved at me. I waved back, and I couldn't wipe the cheesy ass 3rd grade grin off of my face.

We hit the next light. I threw my hands up incredulously, she smile and mouthed follow me.

Oh yes.

I got behind her, with the hopes of getting inside her. There was a Rite Aid up ahead and she put her blinker on. I threw that little annoying green arrow on as well. She pulled into the parking lot slowly, and as she did all I could think about was "Should I run into Rite Aid and pick up some condoms now, or would that be too presumptuous...maybe she will let me hit it bareback."

And then she took off. Gone is less than 60 seconds.

I was crushed. I was dumped by a woman I never dated.

It hurt.

What a bitch, why would she run me through the gamut of emotions. One caveat here, if she were to come back all would be forgiven, but she never did.

Lucky for me my joint got my spirits back up.