Hot Tub

It's 7 a.m. and the delivery men just showed up with my hot tub. I am now one step closer to my dream of a grotto realized. This hot tub will increase my sexual intercourse intake at least 50%; at least that's what the sales person said.

The woman that sold me the tub, may as well not have been wearing a top. I could tell, without much eye strain, that she had lovely areolas. I could also tell that she was going to get me to purchase as many unnecessary amenities as humanly possible.

I am positive that the less clothes a sales woman is wearing, the more money I will spend.

During the purchase I needed a way to come on to this woman without using lines I'm sure she has heard a million times; like:

"You should come over and try this hot tub out."

or

"Are you doing the delivery"

or

"Nice shoes, wanna fuck."


So, I finally went with,

"Uhhh....ummmmm, boy it sure is hot out there."

Seriously, what a complete dolt. I felt like my tongue was fighting the inside of my mouth.

So I signed the contract and all the necessary paperwork and as I left the store I looked at the receipt and DA-DA. There was phone number with a name, and a note saying call me if you have any problems or questions.

Just as soon as I can come up with a clever question that will ensure some playful banter between my hot tub crush and myself I will definitely ring her up.

Unless I'm too busy with all the new poon my hot tub will garner.