Johnny Mac has a big decision to make; really big since he is down double digits to Obama in the polls.
WHO WILL BE THE VEEP?
I am sure Johnny Mac is very capable of choosing a number 2, but I have a couple cents that I am donating to his search, free of charge.
So onto my analysis of the possible Veeps and my choice for Johnny Mac's Veep:
Tim Pawlenty
He has an approval rating of 70% in Minnesota. But Minnesota also elected Jesse "The Body" Ventura as Gov. prior to Tiny Tim, so what the fuck do they know. Tim looks like he has a stamp collection, so he has about a 10% chance to become VEEP; sorry Timmy.Charlie Crist
I actually like Crist, even though he has a God complex due to his last name almost being Christ. This guy lives in Miami and could have half a dozen hot Cuban mistresses if he wants. I doubt Johnny Mac wants an old due so much cooler than he is. He has a 25% chance of being named VEEP; for Crist's sake.
Bobby Jindal
Bobby is the hot candidate as of late. I sure am glad he escaped from Guantanamo Bay with Harold. If he joins McCain's ticket, will Johnny Quest come along too. There is a 20% of Jindal becoming the Veep because Dell would have to hire a new tech. support guy. In all seriousness though, Johnny Mac is twice this guy's age. Johnny Mac's pair of adult diapers have seniority over Jindal. Don't you think Johnny Mac would get annoyed every time Air Force One would have to perform a security strip search on Jindal; I do.
Condoleeza Rice
Black, Check. Woman, Check. Face like horse that was run over by a tank, Check. Rice is smart and an evil genius, so I'll give her 35% chance of being named the Veep. I think the Mac man would always assume someone is bringing him dinner when her name is announced. 
Johnny Mac and Mitt hate each other, which would probably make for a great partnership. They could be our generation's Odd Couple. They could be the new Crockett and Tubbs. They could be the new Tango and Nash. I give Romney a 60% chance of being named Veep. I deducted points because he is a little too good looking for a Republican Governor.
Mike Huckabee
I fuckin hate this guy. Look at his squirrel face. By the way he ate squirrels as a child. Sick bastard. The religious right does like this guy alot, so I am going with 55% chance of Veep possibility. The guy moved his family into a mobile home while his Governor's Mansion was being remodeled. You can take the man out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the man. He also doesn't believe in evolution; yikes. He is a dumb country bumpkin.
I actually like Crist, even though he has a God complex due to his last name almost being Christ. This guy lives in Miami and could have half a dozen hot Cuban mistresses if he wants. I doubt Johnny Mac wants an old due so much cooler than he is. He has a 25% chance of being named VEEP; for Crist's sake.Bobby Jindal
Bobby is the hot candidate as of late. I sure am glad he escaped from Guantanamo Bay with Harold. If he joins McCain's ticket, will Johnny Quest come along too. There is a 20% of Jindal becoming the Veep because Dell would have to hire a new tech. support guy. In all seriousness though, Johnny Mac is twice this guy's age. Johnny Mac's pair of adult diapers have seniority over Jindal. Don't you think Johnny Mac would get annoyed every time Air Force One would have to perform a security strip search on Jindal; I do.Condoleeza Rice
Black, Check. Woman, Check. Face like horse that was run over by a tank, Check. Rice is smart and an evil genius, so I'll give her 35% chance of being named the Veep. I think the Mac man would always assume someone is bringing him dinner when her name is announced.Mitt Romney
Johnny Mac and Mitt hate each other, which would probably make for a great partnership. They could be our generation's Odd Couple. They could be the new Crockett and Tubbs. They could be the new Tango and Nash. I give Romney a 60% chance of being named Veep. I deducted points because he is a little too good looking for a Republican Governor. Mike Huckabee
I fuckin hate this guy. Look at his squirrel face. By the way he ate squirrels as a child. Sick bastard. The religious right does like this guy alot, so I am going with 55% chance of Veep possibility. The guy moved his family into a mobile home while his Governor's Mansion was being remodeled. You can take the man out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the man. He also doesn't believe in evolution; yikes. He is a dumb country bumpkin.MY CHOICE
GEORGE BUSH
He is allowed to become a Veep even though he in the incumbent president. Johnny Mac could ask Bush's opinion on topics and do the exact opposite. But as a writer that loves to try his hand at comedy, Bush creates some of the best fodder. What better way to have Bush sans the power than to have him serve as Veep. So here's to McCain-Bush in '08.
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