Smoking BAN-dits

I started smoking cigarettes at the age of 19. I am not addicted. I just think I look bad ass smoking. Seriously, I picked up the hobby because it makes me feel cool, and anyone that claims smoking isn't cool is a liar, or a cancer survivor; whatever.

I also find it sexy when women smoke- there I said it. But there is a new found benefit to smoking since it has been banned inside almost every bar in almost every major city.It helps me with the ladies.I was and still am anti smoking bans. Smoking and booze are tied together like tampons and string. If you hate smoke don't work in a bar, but I digress.

The only positive aspect of the indoor smoking ban is that the smokers congregate outside of the bar, sans the heavy music and cock blocks. It's nothing but small groups of people with similar interests and a built in conversation starter:

"I hate this smoking ban."

"So do I"

Even if I weren't a smoker I would pick it up just to gain a meaningful excursion from the hot and crowded bar with the permanently wet floor. Even if I weren't a smoker I would pick it up as an easy in with hot chicks that smoke. Even if I weren't a smoker I would pick it up just so I could post myself against the wall of the bar and strike my best James Dean profile with the hopes that it will attract a woman looking for conversation, sex, or at least a light.